I guess I've never started a piece without riddles & disorientedly scrabbled words.
This summer of 09 has reoccurred thoughts that are so cut & dry they almost slice my originals.
Before things get any more crammed inside my warped complexion of a mind -
I should let those know how I feel, collectively of course.
Berto- Things must get hard just so that you can cum. a demolition always happens before re-construction. cliches now seem like fickled positivity given by people so they may be a part of your healing process. They're coming from a good place & their intentions are pure even if after the 2,658th "you're better off. things will fall into place" often end up seeming dissimulating.
with matters of the heart-once emotions nuzzle up where your rationality used to lie- things get sheisty.
black & whites all become grey. so many factors-no one to blame. everyone's ashamed.
we escape ourselves in each other....
I've been to hell & back.
they welcome me with open arms now. I'm a regular.
it's almost as if I'm not phased by that scolding darkness any longer. until heaven calls from a "507" phone number. the inferno repeats itself.
I've been blessed. I sincerely have been. I've had so many take me by the hand & lighten my life with their glistening l.o.v.e. for -me.
An undistinguished regime of my lovely yet unpresent father has taken a toll on my adaptation of good men.
I don't have the heart to speak evils. We share laughs & for that I have felt a warmth impossible from anyone else. I love you Daddy. I look forward to the day I'm given away to someone who can love my scars away.
J- I will never be able write enough words to express how much you have meant in the last near decade. my teacher & student of how it feels to be really loved.truly.
forget gems-you were this girl's best friend.
I've fallen hard for your family & friends. they have become the loves of my life.
you've always had my best interest even when you were showing other women my maneuvers.
Life is not your battle-it's your divine sanction. grasp your needs & let them marinate. fall in love as many times as you can-just be sincere & put yourself at the very top of your list-
yours is the only happiness you can manipulate.
Its taken many years to seek a future life unconsumed with a complicated love story.
R- you have loved me through every terrible endeavor I took you through. You have been my urban love-one unconditional & unfatigued by out skirted perception of a love. We have taken hold of Chicago & you've brought soul where vacant roots used to sit.You have "put me on" to conquests & a musically lit Chicago adventure. I will always feel you.when 2 people have no direction they just keep bumping into each other. I need a destination other than your heart's taste-buds.
"A good man is hard to find. A hard man is good to find."
As of this point I feel like my heart & I have have never dueted. never joined forces to exist cooperatively.I have standards. I'm attracted to distracted minds & difficult precisions.
I need warmth & a combustible attraction. I find a dedication to spontaneity.
A city girl- I've found myself inebriated in the metropolitan-highlighted street lights & dampened by morning afters.
as the windy one blows-I need to find this chicagowoman.
as I leave 23 behind & my 25th year approaches on this planet-
b-I recognize myself in you-
On the globe of my life I've been searching for someone to point ME out.
- I need to arrange my own atlas & make my own itinerary.
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