upcoming... permanentbodypaint.

EeeeeEk! Fall is among us- & how fucking excited am I!

-autumnlicious fashions (which I WILL be taking flicks of my upcoming finds!)

-lovely rows of citrus colored arbor-ness

-crisp weather which always makes me crave more culture.. & hugs

-leather jackets

-layering of all sorts

-coffee & walks, like the ones where you end up miles away from where you started- volunteers please!

Man oh man! this season has provided for me in more ways than likely expressed. Plus my birthday always makes a appearance, every year- never fails! :) September 26th baby! So many endeavors to do in the fabulous season! I want to get the courage to do a spoken word- but I'll have to do some research first! yeeeesah. I want to try new eateries & thrift every chance I get! (AHEMmariebaby)

My biggest quest is... take an autumn-seasoned trip to philly & then to new york. (leaves,flicks,pictures,subways,hotdogs,lights,controlled chaos,hugs & lust- yesplease!)

Stay tuned. work awaits me!

exes & ohs.

-closer was underneath sheets licking words from each other;

when we laid in beds just big enough to fit how we felt.

Deafened by loving you in all languages, peddling to rewind.

You once said you've wasting moments unspent with me,counterclockwise.

Expensively,you financed my soul, I left you bankrupt;unsorted.

drafts became cheap & abundant,eventually wholesale.

you'd planted seeds of raw,illuminate pungency inside me & ....made me glow.

----------------

the 2nd of April /20.oh.eight.

Possessed by a canvas that simply no longer grasped the paint.

Color illuminateless & pasty.

She painted our lives with a splattered spectrum of hues.

arrest for sake of numbness.

Scanning my mother's swollen eyes for some instance of cleanly devastate "Where is 'He' when you need Him?" she sobs,"...why did 'He' take her?"

Those taking God's name to pacify desires for a sense of completion....my appreciation considers more than I had ever imagined, but also impoverishes a few.

-----------------------------

Daddy left because he "just couldn't take her anymore"

So I searched the oceans of miles in between us for his hand to hold.

Adapting to slipping fingers & promises unfit to sow.

He loved me ever so conditionally & asked me why I could never return his calls.

An undistinguished regime of my lovely yet unpresent father has taken a toll on my adaptation of good men.

I don't have the heart to speak evils. We share laughs & for that I have felt a warmth impossible from anyone else.

I love you Daddy. I look forward to the day I'm given away to someone who can love my scars away.

Excuseless & in turn, I was taught to take men's hearts & wring the juice out.

Throughout a process I could never fathom, I took my own aspirations & put them on the shelf. Trophy satisfaction.

Soiled fingertips from dirty sheets caressed my body. Wincing through every touch, I cringed at the the starring role he had self-casted.

I allowed my sexual endeavors to be shared.

Erotic lessons & tongue in cheek role-play,being taught to clueless women.

Driving their inhibitions through the ceiling as they held the wall for balance from his “stamina”.

Those cheap 7 minutes he spent inside ME, took hours to wash clean.

pacified the good men for the good man I knew before he knew how to fuck.

as I sit in beds up all night. pillows take the place of lovers.

I love you,so I have sex with you.I give it to them so that they don’t tarnish my name.

"No one does it just like you do ," he's said, ".. I need you"

give me amnesia-so i can stand into a trustworthy earth. to cover my body with faith.

Wanting to whisper religious expenses,wisped like breath inside his pliable intentions.

Not bitter, just soured.

...By a man that needed me as much he needed a heartbreak.

The soother's approach stark & incomplete. Incompatible words he speaks through his divided attention span. I no longer can see sparkle in the face of the obvious.

Opportunities of justified, REAL LIFE versions of men took numbers as I tolerated for the unchosen one.

Shanghai-as of 2020.

As much as I get aroused by the city's extravangance & the way it turns my heavy heart to flutters. This however, gives me slight anxiety. Almost as if the light strewn from each building, will reach pieces of your soul & made them nothingsomes. Revolution put into mass overdrive. mass production & slow suffice gone.

I write ... a lot. a little. when my mind's bubbling to the brink.

fragmented pieces & run on sentenced feelings. ha.

beautiful shoes & soul-made faces make my heart hurt.

-if you'd like to take a babysteps into the crack of my mind, your footsteps are adored.

enthuse & shine.

possibly, maybe.

kayleighkins!

my dearest kayleigh,

i know, i'm a draggin ass nigga. but you know i love you, so here it is. when my personal IT's fix my computer, i will attempt to create a more suitable graphic.

also, i didn't know which picture you wanted so i picked one of my faves... which was hard cuz shit bitch, you is foine.

unleash your word-ly wrath upon the world.

love always,

your ride or l!ve,
marie.